Drive-Thru Etiquette

Once again, I'm in a bad mood. My portion of this blog is quickly turning into me just talking about things that piss me off. Which is fine. Just something I noticed. Moving on.

Look, people, if you didn't think something as trivial as "drive-thru etiquette" existed, then you're wrong. Let me hit you with some knowledge, so as to prevent you from pissing off others in the future (namely, myself).

The use of a fast food drive-thru is a privilege, and it should not be abused. Last night, I went to McDonalds to get two McDoubles. That's it. Just two McDoubles. For those who don't know, these are simple Dollar Menu sandwiches. There was only one car in front of me when I drove up and got in the line. Thus, considering the speed and general awesomeness of the corporate tyrant that is McDonalds, I though to myself, "Self, the entirety of this trip should last no longer than about 10 minutes." It was currently 8:45 pm. This is when the sh** hit the fan.

Here are the simple rules of Drive-Thru Etiquette that you should follow:

#1) If you intend on placing a large order, please GO INSIDE the restaurant and do it.

The drive-thru is for quick orders. I don't have the time (or the gas) to wait on you and your four friends to order enough food to feed a third-world country. If it's so late at night that inside of the restaurant is closed and only the drive-thru is open, then go to Denny's and quit being so selfish and stupid.

#2) Try to figure out what you want ahead of time.

If you don't know exactly what you want, that's okay. But you should have a general idea, so as not to waste inordinate amounts of time babbling your order into the microphone like an incompetent dolt. Example: if you're going to the Taco Bell drive-thru, decide if you're leaning towards a burrito or a Mexican pizza. Or both. Then quickly work out the details when you see the menu. This is different from being inside the restaurant, where you can stand around, looking at the menu as long as you want before ordering.

#3) Have your money ready BEFORE you get to the pay window.

There's usually even a sign telling you to do this. Don't be a bag and mess it up. Seriously.

#4) After getting your food, absolutely do NOT sit in your car while still in front of the pick-up window and check to make sure they got your order right.

If you spend five minutes searching your bags only to find that they messed it up, then you probably ordered too much food anyway (see rule #1), and when I'm waiting in my car behind you late at night, I'm too hungry to care if you get gypped out of $2. I mean really, it's McDonalds. If it means that much to you, then go through the line again and let me get my food, you fool.

#5) If you have sat in front of the pick-up window arguing with the window guy for so long that the other cars in the line are HONKING at you, then you need to shut your piehole and MOVE.

Which brings me back to my story. The car in front of me was being driven by a lady with four kids. Which is fine; that being said, I'd even give her a little leeway. But in a staggering show of utter ineptitude, she managed to break EVERY single rule aforementioned. If she had just gone inside, it would have saved everybody, including herself, considerable time. When I finally got my food, it was 9:15 pm, and the line was wrapped around the entire restaurant. Should I ever have to wait 30 minutes in the McDonalds drive-thru when there's only one car in front of me? Of course not. Should some people get punched square in the face? Absolutely.

-CSell

Black and White

I am not a very good at writing. I am not eloquent. I am not to the point. I am not very clear most of the time. Maybe thats why I write. Because I like imperfections. Imperfections can be beautiful. What may seem pedestrian to some may be a beautiful picture or phrase to someone else. A missed note, a slip of the tongue, a scar.

There are no perfect circles. That always seemed odd to me. I wanted there to be perfect circles when I was younger. I tried to draw them. I could get close but most of the time those circles were traced with a cup. I don't know why I wanted there to be perfect circles so bad. My math teacher in 11th grade, Mr. Mangers, once drew the most perfect circle I have ever seen right before class started. He said it was an accident. It was an awesome accident. We oohed and ahhed and some of us took pictures on our phones.

I used to listen to a saxophonist named Eric Alexander. He had a brilliantly warm and powerful tone. But as I grew up I began to notice something about his playing that always irked me. It was something I couldn't put my finger on until recently.

Eric doesn't miss a single change.

Everything is calculated. There was nothing that stood out to me because it all started to sound the same. There wasn't enough emotion in his playing. It felt static.

Things that are perfect seem fake to me most of the time. Because nothings really perfect, right? If something were perfect however, wouldn't that make it stand out? Mr. Mangers' circle definitely did. Mother Teresa's love did. The sacrifices of the men who gave their lives on the beaches of Normandy did. What if this was all pointing to something? What if I were to say they were pointing to, not something, but someone? Someone that wasn't static. Or a circle.

Blake

"Owl City" needs to go curl up in a corner and die.

Alright, time for a resurrection...

This blog post isn't actually about Owl City. However, I felt the need to bluntly express my sentiments in regards to that band, so there. Moving on.

My rant will be quick and to the point today. Basically, President Barack Obama has formed the habit of blaming his predecessor(s) for the problems that he is now facing. He's done it several times before, and he's now doing it again, this time blaming Bush for the problems in Afghanistan. He has also previously blamed Bush for the following:

- national debt/the "inherited economy"/our "financial mess"

- unemployment rates

- low approval ratings

- starting the automaker bailout

- various socialist policies

- various Democrat election losses

Etc.

Now, to be fair (and sensible), I'm not going to pretend that some of these problems weren't indeed prevalent during the Bush Administration, because that would be pure idiocy.

HOWEVER...

I, too, have a list for President Obama. You see, Mr. President, the American people DID NOT elect you into office so that you could do the following:

- point fingers

- make excuses

- establish scapegoats

- make excuses

- whine

- criticize past presidents

- make excuses

Oh... did I mention, "make excuses"?

We elect a president into office so that he can FIX the country's problems, not to talk about how much somebody else sucks.

Folks, while it is quite hilarious, it's also quite unsettling that President Obama would use a smoke screen of Bush-bashing to try and distract the American people from the real issue: the inability of the Obama Administration to solve problems and get things done. This is known as "incompetence."

Finger-pointing behavior can be found in most elementary school-age children. Show a little class, Mr. President, and leave a legacy based on your own merits, not on the failures of others.

-CSell

"Most Pathetic Major League Baseball Team of 2008" award goes to...

...the New York Yankees. (lol...wut?)

Even the most unsavvy person in the ways of all things baseball will understand the following, so stay with me here. Every major league team has a payroll, which is the money they use to pay their players. However, some teams get WAY more money than others. To see just how different they are, let's take a look at the lowest and highest payrolls from the 2008 season:

#1) New York Yankees $209,081,579

#2) Detroit Tigers $138,685,197

... ...

#29) Tampa Bay Rays $43,820,598

#30) Florida Marlins $21,836,500

As you can see, the gap between the Yankees and Marlins is utterly ridiculous. With all of that money, the Yankees should be going to the play-offs every year without fail. There's no excuse for them to do anything less. Which brings me to the point of this thread.

Last year, they failed.

A 3rd place finish in the American League East meant that the New York Yankees became an example of one of the worst cost/success ratios in the history of professional sports. A team with less than a fourth of their payroll, the Tampa Bay Rays, was able to finish 1st in the toughest division in all of baseball. To break it down further, let's take a look at what else $200 million can buy...

With the '08 Yankees payroll, the '08 Tampa Bay Rays organization could have:

A) constructed a life-size replica of the S.S. Titanic

-or-

B) paid for Barack Obama's preposterously expensive $150 million inauguration ceremony

-or-

C) produced the original Star Wars trilogy three times

-or-

D) purchased two Boeing 787 Dreamliners

...and still have enough money to pay all their players and beat the Yankees to the division title!  

I'm sorry, but that is just pathetic.

-Chris

I figured an introductory post was in order, so here we go... welcome to the first ever posting of the Clank Tank, a conglomeration of thoughts from Blake Deibel and Chris Sell. Indeed, there's much to talk about, so enough messing around. Next post.

Chris